If this isn’t a week of outrageousness, I don’t know what is. We’ve got Bill O’Reilly talking about how he was divinely inspired to write his latest book, Todd Starnes wondering if he’ll still be fondled by the TSA if there’s a government shutdown, FoxNews.com trying to make the shutdown sound like a diet plan – and oh, so much more. You’ve got your work cut out for you this week, dear readers!

And the nominees are...

Bill O’Reilly, opining that he was divinely inspired to write his new book, “Killing Jesus”: “And I believe because I’m a Catholic that (inspiration) comes from the Holy Spirit. My inspiration comes from that... so I wrote “Killing Jesus” because I think I was directed to write that. …I’m just one of many who have been given gifts. I can write. I can bloviate on TV. So I’m trying to use the gifts in a positive way. And I believe that’s all directed and that’s why I’m here on the planet.”

Bill O’Reilly discussing the “development” of his on-air persona: “I was a little thug and now I’m gettin’ paid millions of dollars for being a big thug.”

Todd Starnes getting to the heart of what’s important as the government shutdown loomed: “Will TSA Fondle Our Private Parts if Uncle Sam Shuts Down?”

FoxNews.com for turning making the government shutdown sound like a diet plan: “GOVERNMENT SHUTDOWN? Not really – turns out it’s more of a SLIMDOWN.”

Senator Ted Cruz pretending to be a uniter fighting against the government shutdown he helped engineer: “This is Harry Reid’s shutdown. …We need to put the partisan politics of Barack Obama and Harry Reid behind us. …I think we’re saddened every day by the political gamesmanship of this administration.”

Brian Kilmeade, apparently thinking all Hispanics eat the same food when he asked Nicaraguan Maria Molina: “You grew up on tacos, correct?”

Stuart Varney arguing that furloughed government workers don’t deserve to get back pay: “I’m sick and tired of a massive bloated federal bureaucracy living on our backs and taking money out of us, a lot more money than most of us earn in the private sector, then giving a furlough, and then getting their money back at the end of it. Sorry, I’m not for that. I want to punish these people. Sorry to say that. That’s what I want to do.”

Senator Mike Lee slobbering over the government shutdown: We’ve got John Boehner and Eric Cantor acting heroically in order to protect the American people from the harmful effects of Obamacare.

Anna Kooiman, so eager to blow the “Obama’s a secret Muslim” dog whistle that she never bothered to fact-check a parody news story about Obama funding a Muslim museum: “The Republican National Committee is offering to pay for (the World War II Memorial) to keep it open so that the veterans from Honor Flight are going to be able to go and see this. …It really doesn’t seem fair, especially—and we’re going to talk a little bit later in the show, too, about some things that are continuing to be funded. And President Obama has offered to pay out of his own pocket for the museum of Muslim culture - out of his own pocket - yet it’s the Republican National Committee who’s paying for this.”