The Five's Catholics support Catholic positions which correspond to right wing ideology, such as reproductive rights and the ACA birth control mandate. Eric Bolling and Kimberly Guilfoyle frequently allude to their faith. But they don't have the same zealotry when it comes to immigration, an issue on which their Church is quite liberal. Last week (7/30), The Five attacked Rep. Nancy Pelosi for her commentary on immigration which referenced the National Conference of Catholic Bishops. Rather than examine what the Pope and Catholic leaders have said about the issue, the crew used her statement to push anti-immigration talking points and defend themselves against charges that they hate immigrant children and are bad Christians. Oh, nooo.....

Former altar boy Greg Gutfeld opening was an attempt at irony, I guess. After saying that "Nancy Pelosi condemns the separation of church and state," he played video of Pelosi who, in speaking about the need to treat the border immigrants with compassion, referenced the commentary of the National Conference of Catholic Bishops. Ironically, the bishops' opposition to the contraceptive mandate was fully supported by Fox News.

Gutfeld made an attempt at humor, I guess: "Well, in that case, I have no heart and no soul. I hate Children, especially babies. They are just hairless cats with thumbs." He got serious: "I'm glad I got that out of the way, because that's what pro-amnesty types imply about anyone who favors legal over illegal immigration. It starts with Obama, trickles down to Pelosi, and then the media laughs it up. The gimmick is meant to silence you through fear of personal attack. You don't want these children with their teddy bears? You are Satan. No, you're worse than Satan, you are a Republican." He continued his monologue about "amnesty preachers" with his patented blend of incoherent snark and what he thinks is profundity. There was, of course, Pelosi bashing: "Hey, Bob, Nancy Pelosi teaching compassion is like you teaching restraint. Is deportation of illegals un-Christian?"

Devout candle lighting, pro-life Catholic, Eric Bolling, "as Christian as they come," provided his perspective: Christians believe you want to be compassionate, be compassionate. Nancy, if you want to be -- 250 million bucks, you want to spend some of that, knock yourself out. Adopt a few Mexican babies, that would be fantastic. Do it yourself. But don't tell everyone else. We don't want to adopt Mexican babies. I don't, I have a 15-year-old. I don't want to adopt any more babies."  (the Catholic Bollings have only one child?) He later babbled about getting death threats.

Kimberly Guilfoyle continued with the oh, so popular right wing victimization theme: "Why should we be preached to say you're not a good Christian unless you support amnesty and breaking the law" Oh please, Guilfoyle is talking about being preached to on a show that constantly preaches the gospel of the right wing.

Dana, atheists should leave the country if they don't like the Pledge of Allegiance, Perino suggested that the left is being hypocritical in bringing religion into the immigration debate because they objected to the religious basis of the Hobby Lobby decision. (Treatment of immigrants does not equal a SCOTUS decision but whatever). She worked in the requisite Pelosi bashing: "When Supreme Court announced the Hobby Lobby decision, the left were saying that small business owners do not have a right to practice their religion. They do not have a right to bring their beliefs into a policy arena. But that is what she is trying to do today."

The main man for the Fox Catholics, Pope Francis said this about the situation at the border: "This humanitarian emergency requires, as a first urgent measure, these children be welcomed and protected."

Are the Five's Catholics "Cafeteria Catholics?" Oh, no.....