Cecily Strong brought back Judge Jeanine Pirro to Saturday Night Live’s cold open last night. With her was “Bruce Schroeder,” the judge in the Rittenhouse trial, “Donald Trump” and, in a brief cameo, “Kevin McCarthy."
Some favorite quotes from Strong’s Pirro: “If anyone watching is wearing a hearing aid, sorry, you’re dead now.” On Kyle Rittenhouse: “That lovable scamp was put through a nightmare of a trial just for doing the bravest thing any American can do, protecting an empty used car lot in someone else’s town.”
Strong/Pirro said Schroeder was “as impartial as a dance mom, clapping harder than anyone.” To “Schroeder,” she said, “What turned me on the most was how you ruled that courtroom with an iron fist. Tell us how you did it.”
Mikey Day, playing Schroder, replied, “I ordered that the prosecution not use the word 'victims,' they were rioters, and they weren’t shot, they were gadoinked, but that did not give my client an unfair advantage in any way.”
Strong/Pirro: “You said 'my client,' did you mean the defendant?”
“Ooooohh, oh yeah sure,” Day/Schroder said.
“You do you, Judge, you do you,” Strong/Pirro said.
Later, Strong/Pirro showed a brief clip of “Kevin McCarthy” who, she said, “rocked the House down with his awe-inspiring, eight-hour tirade against the Build Back Better bill, demonstrating why the filibuster is vital to our democracy.”
Then it was on to, “What was President Brandon doing? Getting socialized butt play, paid for by your tax dollars. Now Democrats are praising passed-out Joe for his big deal infrastructure bill, but where’s the thanks for the real muchacho who got this done? Please welcome this people’s sexiest man alive, President Donald Trump.”
Trump was played again by James Austin Johnson.
Watch it below, from the November 20, 2021 Saturday Night Live.
I’m increasingly likely to use that term for fascist hooligans.
That said, I actually feel sorry for the kid because the fascists who are encouraging this good-squad behaviour will drain all the substance from him and then throw him into the gutter. Zimmerman and Joe the Plumber are nobodies, nowadays. Rittenhouse seems (to me) to be too fragile and too feckless to become a “heroic” figure and he will have another judge the next time. I see him as a younger, more fragile version of the QAnon shaman (a vegan !!!!) who will be passing a few months in jail.
Meanwhile, yes, the families of the victims should sue the pants off Rittenhouse, if only because that money would not be frittered away.
The TFG surrogate is getting better but his body language needs loosening up.