News Hounds: Aunty's Antics

Aunty's Antics

November 15, 2011

Fox And Friends Outsource Smears To Comedian Brad Stine Again

Proving they learned absolutely nothing from the Hank Williams, Jr. fiasco—when he blurted out that President Obama was the enemy, leading to Williams being forcibly retired as ESPN’s Football Readyist—those Foxy Friends on Fox and Friends dragged out comedian Brad Stine for his weekly attack on the left. [Does two Mondays in a row on Fox “News” constitute “weekly”?] After last week’s appearance Priscilla noted that Stine, “as a youth, led the ‘carny life’ and went on to doing stand-up. After his conversion to Christianity, he made his faith the focus of his acts. Because he's a Christian, he doesn't use profanity… He founded ‘God Men’ a Christian group that emphasizes ‘spiritual Christianity’ and who ‘give thanks’ to God for their testosterone.” Yet, despite his proclaimed deep faith in Christianity, Stine demonstrated none of the compassion and charity that one might expect from Jesus, even a Jesus with balls. No matter. Stine was brought on to smear unemployed ‘Merkins as lazy people and he didn’t disappoint. Watch:

Reported by Aunty Em at 9:47 AM

November 10, 2011

Eric Bolling Adds Media Matters To The Cain Conspiracy

Glenn Beck had his Caliphate Clues, now The Five’s Eric Bolling has his Cain Conspiracy Cabal™. News Hounds reported Tuesday how Bolling blamed shadowy “Democrat” operatives for the Herman Cain sexual harassment allegations. Against all logic and evidence to the contrary, he contended the Democratic Party has been working behind the scenes to tear down Republicans and Right Wing candidates; this is just Cain’s turn in the dunk tank. Not content to leave it there, Bolling doubled down the next night. He added “the left wing nutjobs at Media Matters and all the other leftie blogs” (which includes News Hounds, I guess) to the clandestine group trying to take down Herman Cain. Watch:

Reported by Aunty Em at 10:01 AM

Fox and Friends To Florida Inmates: Let Them Eat Soy

The Foxy Friends on Fox and Friends proved Wednesday morning they don’t even need guests to push the Fox “News” agit-prop, or to have some fun at someone else’s expense. At issue was Eric Harris, an inmate in central Florida who is suing for “cruel and unusual punishment” because the prison system is serving a soy-laden, meat-free vegan diet. According to the Florida News Journal “Harris is claiming that it has threatened his thyroid, caused painful gastrointestinal cramping, and compromised his immune system, all things which he says are medical problems for him and are listed as possible side effects of eating too much soy.” However, you wouldn’t hear any of that from The Three Stooges, who seemed to be echoing Bizarro Marie Antoinette. Watch:

Reported by Aunty Em at 7:31 AM

November 8, 2011

Eric Bolling Takes Herman Cain’s Conspiracy Theory One Crazy Step Further

The accusations that Herman Cain allegedly sexually harassed several women is a classic “She said/He said” news story, with no corroborating evidence for either side (at the time of this writing). When one woman came forward to make allegations, Cain was pretty much forced to hold his own presser to push back at the charges. And there it stands. However, while he denied all, Cain also said he knew who was responsible for his troubles: the “Democrat Machine.” When Fox “News” cut to an abridged version of The Five, Herman Cain was obviously going to be the topic. That’s when it got crazy. Eric Bolling was only happy to echo Cain’s conspiracy and Bob Beckel kept trying to (figuratively) knock some sense into him. But Bolling wasn't having any of that because he took the conspiracy to new heights: He practically blamed every problem that every conservative has ever had on a mysterious Democratic cabal that he would never name, no matter how many times Beckel tried to drag it out of him. Watch the fireworks:

Reported by Aunty Em at 9:09 PM

November 5, 2011

Peter Johnson Claims Occupy Movement Is Unacceptable

The “Fear and Balanced Network,” aka The Fox “News” Channel, seems happiest when its personalities are able to instill fear in its audience. Among the Fear and Balanced things you should fear include, but are not limited to, Muslims; labor unions; The Phony Wars on Christmas and Halloween; Immigrants, especially the undocumented kind; creeping Socialism; creeping Sharia Law; the creeping President of the United States of ‘Merka; and Black ‘Merkins in general that are neither president, nor Herman Cain. However, judging by the sheer amount of airtime devoted to it in such a short period of time—not to mention the over-the-top demagoguery—the thing Fox “News” wants its viewers to fear the most these days is the Occupy Wall Street Movement. Seeming to be leading the Fox pitchfork crowd are Eric Bolling and Peter Johnson, Jr., both of whom go farther in their condemnation of OWS than other Fox “News” readers. Therefore, it was a glorious two-fer Friday when Eric Bolling (filling in on Fox and Friends for one of the blonde Foxy Friends) hosted the Knight of Malta, Peter Johnston, Jr.