A scandal ridden Vatican reaches out to an American news network that is owned by a man who was knighted by the Pope for his financial contributions. This network provides the papacy with total support for their opposition to a Democratic American president's policy on contraceptive equality. An American cardinal publicly derides the Democratic president on this news network which is a mouthpiece for the reactionary, religious right. This network employs, as its only official clergy *religious contributor, a Catholic priest who had been a member of a secretive and scandal ridden order and who uses his network pulpit to promote Catholic dogma and reactionary, right wing politics. The network also employs, as a legal analyst, a Catholic "Knight of Malta." In order to improve its image, tarnished by pedophile priests and reports of corruption at its core, the Vatican hires a reporter, who is also a member of a Catholic cult, from this network. While this seeming quid-pro-quo sounds like a plot in a Dan Brown novel, it's not fiction. The Vatican just hired Fox News' Rome correspondent to "help its communication strategy." Material for a Da Vinci Code sequel?
Greg Burke, the Rome correspondent for Fox News, will be a senior communications advisor in the Vatican's secretariat of state. As such he will "help integrate communications issues within the Vatican's top administrative office, the secretariat of state, and will help handle its relations with the Holy See press office and other Vatican communications offices." Burke joined Fox in 2001. Prior to that, he was with "Time." Interestingly, he is also a member of "Opus Dei," a secretive Catholic lay order whose members are into some seriously kinky S&M or as they call it "mortification of the flesh" involving whips and chains. Given that Opus Dei is quite popular at the Vatican, with an Opus Dei Cardinal heading the Vatican's internal leak investigation, it's not surprising that they reached out to Burke who admits that his membership might have "come into play."
Anyway, as a former Fox employee, Burke will be able to carefully craft lies and propaganda provide vital assistance to the Vatican which, like Fox News, is all about being fair & balanced. Just kidding. Rather than a Dan Brown plot device, this is more like a joke which could provide some great material for late night comedy!
*Correction - Fr. Morris is listed, on the Fox website, as a religious "contributor." He is not an religious "correspondent" as is Lauren Green who is - surprise, surprise - another devout Roman Catholic in the Fox News chancery. But the important thing to know is that he is the only clergy who functions in the capacity of religious contributor. He has a regular Sunday morning slot and appears on other Fox shows. There are no Jewish rabbis, evangelical pastors, mainline Protestant clergy, or spaghetti monster forbid Muslim imams who have an ongoing Fox News presence. While women clergy have been interviewed as guests, none are on, as far as I know, the Fox payroll. As the Catholic Church is the "one true church," Morris is their own true priest who guides his TV flock the "right" way, if you catch my drift. So for Fox News to say that it is "fair & balanced," when the only TV clergy perspective is Morris' is a crock of holy shit.
And BTW, Green does some interesting and informative stuff on the not for TV videos. She really should do more on the network. It would be nice if she had her own show. Unlike other networks, Fox has no regular African-American host so having her as an anchor would do a lot for their melanin challenged host line-up. But for Fox, having a priest push the propaganda is so much better because "father knows best." Ya think!
Addendum - I've been informed by fans on the "Dollar Dump" site (the guy who "cyber-raped" our former writer Headley Westerfield) that Green is not a Catholic. Mea Culpa. I seemed to recall that she once identifed herself as a Catholic but I was wrong. Funny, when outright lies are told on the Fox News channel, these clowns don't get their panties in a bunch like they do when they "catch" us saying something incorrect. But unlike Fox (and Johnny's man crush, Bill O'Reilly) I am perfectly willing to stand corrected. And yes, Kelly Wright, an African American, is one of the hosts on Fox's week-end Fox News Headquarters. Now that's an impressive gig. Arthel Neville doesn't seem to be a regular host.
That was easy! The puppet strings were already attached anyway!