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Fox & Friends Loves NASCAR Preacher's "Smoking Hot Wife" Prayer

Reported by Priscilla - July 27, 2011 -

If - say - a liberal, gay clergyman gave a public invocation in which he gave praise to Jesus for his totally ripped husband, how do you think Fox & Friends would handle it? I suspect that, along with the usual suspects in the religious right, they would be talking about how this is just another example of the degradation of our society. But recently, a good, ole Southern preacher provided the official NASCAR "prayer" in which he gave thanks for performance racing cars and his "smoking hot wife." MSNBC's "Morning Joe" joked about how this scene was like something out of "Talladega Nights" and played the video of Will Ferrell's "Ricky Bobby's" blessing of his supper which was praise for the fatty junk food on the table. But in the world of Fox & Friends, the kind of pompous, public prayer (which was funny as it was just so NASCAR) that was done at NASCAR is what "real" America is all about. And in this Fox nation, women's hotness is considered a divine blessing. This morning's Fox & Friends actually treated this homily with deference and allowed the preacher to defend himself against critics who, BTW, aren't evil libruls. And to show that Fox values "hot" women, former Miss America and good Christian patriot Gretchen Carlson showed off her *tanned, toned legs and upper torso. And for that, one suspects, many "real" American men and boys gave thanks.

Doocy, Kilmeade, and pretty in pink Carlson laughed uproariously while the video of the preacher was shown. (Wonder what Fox's Father Jonathan Morris would say. Oh, right, he doesn't have a "smoking, hot wife.") But things got a little serious when Doocy said that this "hilarious and inspirational message" has received "some negative reaction." Doocy didn't mention that much of the criticism is coming from the evangelical community some of whom have termed it "unadulterated blasphemy." After Doocy introduced Tennessee Baptist pastor, Joe Helms, he asked him "how's your smoking hot wife this morning?" To Kilmeade's question of his wife's reaction to the prayer, Helms said she was just fine with it and said that "if more men in this country were thankful for their wives, the country would be in better shape." Gretch shouted that she was "129% behind you." She was just so thrilled that she jiggled for joy as she put on a slight Southern accent and said "we all know that marriage is more than just being friends." (Right wing Christians do love their sex - albeit only heterosexual, within marriage, and open to conception) She laughed at her own humor.

To Doocy's question of whether Helms had been inspired by "Talladega Nights," Helms said that he had seen clips of the movie (some video sans audio was shown) but is wasn't the inspiration. As the pastor continued to talk about his prayer and how surprised his wife was, the gang just kept tittering. Gretch referenced a report in which pastor's kids laughed so hard when the "smoking hot" comment was made. Helms said that his little girl was "laying on the floor laughing" and how his son, who was at the track, also laughed. Without noting who the critics are, Kilmeade asked Helms how he would respond to them. Helms did a little preachin when he said that what he was doing was "reaching out to a world without Christ" and those, at the racetrack, who don't think they're good enough to go to church. He continued his message that "living for Christ is fun and being a Christian is not the end of living" and that Christ "wants our job to be full" and that "you can still have fun and be saved." Gretch who was just busting out with the joy of Jesus said "no doubt." A good time was had by all.

Comment: Dear Jesus, please help all the little girls across this great land to grow up to be smoking hot so that they can find themselves a fine, NASCAR loving, Jesus praising, Republican voting heterosexual man. And thank you for Fox News which praises your glory and provides Christian inspiration to all who bask in its real journalism, fair & balanced. Amen

* It's interesting how different networks place and dress their female anchors. Mika Brzezinski fits the definition of "smoking hot" as she is quite pretty. She also has great runners legs which are only shown at the end of the program during the "What did you learn today" segment in which the cast is standing. The rest of the time she and the others are shown from the waist up. Her lovely couture (an occasional Lily Pulitzer and Hermes scarf) doesn't emphasize "cleavage." Obviously what constitutes "business professional" varies from network to network.


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