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In Last Week On Air Beck Doubles Down on Crazy Conspiracies

Reported by Aunty Em - June 28, 2011 -

If anyone thought that Glenn Beck would go quietly into that good night, they would have been mistaken. Any other rational person fired from their job (although neither the propaganda network nor Beck are calling the carefully stage-managed exit a firing) might develop some humility, do some real soul searching, and admit where they may have been wrong. Not our Glenn Beck and that’s why we love him so. With just four shows left to his name on Fox “News,” the former-prop comedian has eschewed the frogs, puppets, and pies—and barely touched his world famous chalkboards*— in order to insist that everything that has happened anywhere in the world validates every crazy conspiracy he ever uttered. And, he manages to wrap them all up with a single bow. Watch how deft he is in this clip, which was Monday’s “cold opening,” before the credits even rolled:

Video courtesy Media Matters

Starting with a series of Flash Mob/Flash Robs, he quickly links that up to perennial enemy Saul Alinski, and then to Lucifer, and then to facebook. No, really. Next: Some weekend violence in Washington, D.C. gives him the opportunity for an attack on a Caribbean festival and a gratuitous mention of Bob Marley. [Having met Bob Marley, I have to ask: Am I the only one troubled by the fact that all the footage and incidents Beck detailed involved Black people? I’m sure there was White violence, White crime somewhere, but Beck never seems to find that, unless it’s in Europe.] And then, of course, he blamed it all on Leftists and his other regular nemesis Francis Fox Piven. “It’s almost like they are giving out advice and the people on the streets are taking it.”

From there, it was only a hop skip and a jump to say that ‘Merka will begin to look like Europe. “But isn’t that the Socialist Progressive utopia? [That] We need to be more like Europe? [Points to video of European protests against austerity.] That’s what’s happening in Europe. At some point—I believe it was in the 1880s—the elites in this country, along with Woodrow Wilson, decided we needed to be more like Europe and we needed to model them. Well, they’ve accumulated massive debt. They’ve had all kinds of red tape. It’s impossible to do business there. And now Europe is self-destructing.”

With barely a pivot we are suddenly in Egypt. Then quickly to a split screen: Reggae festival violence on one side with Egyptian protests on the other. Pointing to screen he says, “This is what democracy looks like.” But he’s not done yet, because Beck has some recent video of some crazy, unidentified, Muslim saying some crazy nonsense about democracy being a crazy idea, because it might lead to the crazy notion of women and homosexuals having freedom. That’s when Beck approached the camera, putting his mug right into the lens, and screamed, “AMERICA! HELLO! WHEN ARE YOU GONNA WAKE UP!” Roll the opening credits.

When he screams at ‘Merka, he drops his mask, as any body-language expert will confirm. He is truly and visibly angry. America is not listening and he only has 4 more shows to get people to understand that we’re screwed. LISTEN TO ME! PLEASE! I’M SO NEEDY.

Astute readers of these columns and/or passionate Beck-watchers might be saying to themselves right now, “Wait just a darn minute! It’s not a true Beck Conspiracy Theory without George Soros? Where was George Soros?” And, they’d be right. Within minutes he’s calling Soros “Vlad the Impaler.” **

Video Courtesy Media Matters

* Still trying to determine who gets custody of the chalkboards after the split

** More about George Soros in another post about Glenn Beck’s Monday interview with Texas Governor Rick Perry