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A News Hounds Contest: What Will Replace Glenn Beck On Fox News?

Reported by Aunty Em - June 25, 2011 -

As News Hounds’ resident expert on all things Glenn Beck related, I have been asked two questions relentlessly (on the patio at the coffee shop) since it was announced that Fox “News” is dumping the Glenn Beck Program next week:

1). Will you still follow Glenn Beck after he leaves Fox “News”?

2). What will replace Glenn Beck at 5PM EST on the propaganda network?

For the record here are my replies:

1). I was originally approached by News Hounds to write about Glenn Beck when Ellen learned I watched it religiously and could deconstruct his crazy cogently. Why did I watch it? Because it was (unintentionally) the funniest show on Fox “News,” far surpassing the yuks per hour on the (unintentionally) funny Fox & Friends morning zoo. But, no, I will not be following Glenn Beck to his web-only GB[L]TV. For one thing, once he’s off the so-called news channel I will no longer have any reason to monitor him because it falls outside News Hounds’ bailiwick. More importantly: I certainly won’t pay good money for that verbal diarrhea—money that will only go to enrich the modern-day Father Charles Coughlin. In point of fact: I will miss him, though.

2). Your guess is as good as mine.

Which brings us to the News Hounds Contest: Who or what will replace Glenn Beck on Fox “News?” The first person who posts the correct answer in the comment thread will win a Glenn Beck autographed copy of his children’s version of “The Christmas Sweater.” [Provenance of autograph found here.]

A few simple rules: 1). To win you must be willing to share your snail mail address; 2). Correct answer to be decided on July 14th (after a pattern emerges) or when Fox News makes an official announcement, whichever comes first; 3). In the event that no one correctly guesses what happens to the 5PM slot, the prize will be rewarded to the most amusing answer as decided by a panel of News Hound judges; 4). Contest open to all readers of News Hounds, except employees of Fox “News,” Glenn Beck, and the News Hounds.

On your mark, get set, go!