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Cue the waterworks! Beck Cries on National TV. Again.

Reported by Guest Blogger - October 17, 2009 -

Guest blogged by Jonathan

The last time I saw the TV crybaby and self-proclaimed "rodeo clown," Glenn Beck, balling in front of the camera, he was exhorting us to "be that person that you were… on September 12." Thursday (10/15/09), Glenn Beck shed a few tears over how politicians can't take us back to that simpler time; they can only take us further away. With video.

Beck's trail of tears began with the ever-so-gentle voice quaver: "I think if a politician came to us and said, 'do you remember that simpler time in America, and I know it wasn't a perfect time. America has always had her problems, big and small, but do you remember - do your remember how that felt? Do you remember what life was like?'" Exactly what simpler time in America was Beck referring to? The days when suburbia was modeled after Leave It to Beaver and Modern Family? The times when it was thought that a woman's place was in the kitchen? Or did he mean the Reagan era when greed was good?

Beck later showed two clips - an old Coca-Cola commercial in which a young boy gave a worn-out football player his soda and a Kodak commercial that featured the song "Times Of Your Life." What purpose did they serve? Your guess is as good as mine.

Afterward, Beck paused, closed his eyes, and shook his head solemnly, as if the man could leak a few if he continued on: "...No politician can take you there; they can only take you farther from there..." All while choking up ever so slightly.

For the third act, Beck compared America to two teenagers going to a party they were not supposed to be at, losing track of time and coming home at two in the morning, smelling like a brewery and a hemp store. The camera zoomed in on him so we could see those orbs sparkling with a mixture of tears and emotion!

Near the end of the analogy, we came to the climax, where Beck said we’d have to suffer the punishment of being “financially grounded.” But, he continued, “In the long run, you will look at your children...” He grimaced, as though he could not hold back any longer. He paused for a few seconds seeming to pull himself together enough to carry on. Then, with his voice dripping with heartache and pleading, "...and you will tell them, that you hated it, you hated the things that you did at the time because they were hard, but your dad was right and you're glad you did it." Ladies and gentlemen, you have just witnessed another tour-de-force in Glenn Beck's version of Masterpiece Theater!

This was Beck at his most cynical: a cold, calculating huckster, posing as a compassionate, down-on-his-luck father.