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Crowd of Fifteen at Pro-Palin "Fire David Letterman" Rally

Reported by Alex - June 18, 2009 -

Did you hear about the “Fire David Letterman” rally in New York City on June 16th? What, you didn’t? What are you, deaf and blind? I mean, there was a huge crowd there – hundreds! Oops, make that fifty. No, make that fifteen.
With video after the jump.

What if they held a protest rally and nobody came? Well, the organizers of the “Fire David Letterman” rally in support of Sarah Palin and her daughter (which one? the 14 year old or the 17-year-old?) just about found out when they attracted more media than participants to their little demonstration in front of the Ed Sullivan Theater in New York, home to David Letterman’s show. New York Magazine was there to film the event, which was small but perfectly entertaining.

Their video (embedded below) opens with the one thing no decent rally can do without, the Broken Record Person. (For our younger readers, a “record” was a round vinyl thing with grooves that played music when traced with a needle.) In this case it was Broken Record Lady, chanting “Fiyer Dave! Fiyer Dave! Fiyer Dave!” Sheesh, she should at least learn to spell.

Then we meet Earnestly Concerned Lady. “Everyone in the country is very, very frustrated and upset that he was allowed to make a rape joke about a little girl, 14 years old, sitting on the sidelines watching, of all things, an American basketball game.” Ummmm, lady, it wasn’t a rape joke, and it was a baseball game, not a basketball game.

Next up is New York Guy. First he says, “He made A-Rod a pervoit too!” (Now, I have a question: how do New Yorkers decide when to turn the “-er” sound into “oi”? Is there a rule, like “Oi sounds like “e” except after “v”?) Then he follows up with the classic New York insult, “I think he stinks!” Go, New York Guy! Spoken like a true Yankees fan!

Not to be outdone, blonde-bobbed-forty-something New York Lady with Sunglasses jabs her finger at the camera and declares, “He’s too old to be on that damn show anyway! He’s not funny, he’s a JERK!” (pronounced as it’s spelled, so she must be from the northern suburbs, or at least the Upper West Side.) “At least Jay Leno has interesting people! This schmuck has nobody!” Then, peering into the camera lens: “Do you know what schmuck means in Jewish?” Oh, now "Jewish" is a language? You mean like “illegal alien”? With a question like that, she hadda be a goy.

Speaking of questions: has the question “who was really behind this protest" ever crossed your mind? Well, I think I have the answer. It was the Bring Back Jay Leno Club. All of the protestors interviewed for the New York Magazine video declared their loyalty to, and admiration for, Leno – except for one poor dude (Spotty Looking Student) who admitted that he only watches Fox News Channel (who, btw, are still pimping various anti-Letterman actions).

I’ll bet they all watch FNC, because the level of hypocrisy at the rally certainly sank to a Fox News low. Here we have these solid citizens calling for the firing of a late-night comedian who made a joke about the alleged sexual proclivities of an erstwhile Vice-Presidential candidate’s daughter – a candidate who paraded the pregnancy of her unwed daughter as a testament to the failure of abstinence education the triumph “pro-life” values – and what do they call Letterman’s son? A bastard. Oh, and his wife is a slut. Of course, those epithets only apply to liberals. “IOKIYAR”, stupid.

Is Head Teabagger Michael Patrick Leahy a Leno fan? We don’t know about that, but we do know that this denizen of Freeper-Creeperville is the registered owner of firedavidletterman.com, the site that was used to organize the protest. The thought did cross my mind that there might be a hidden agenda when Skinny Dancing Fool (you’ve seen this guy at festivals, stoned out of his gourd and boogie-ing with imaginary friends) speechified, “Wake up! Socialism is EE-vil!” and Blonde New York Lady with Sunglasses mugged, “Close the borders! Clean your house and you’ll see how this economy will come back” (Oh, really? Pass the rubber gloves!) Also at the rally but not shown in this video are L.A. radio talk show host, ardent Palin supporter and former homicide plotter John Ziegler, and Hillary-Clinton-fanatic/crystal-ball-gazer/Obama-hating/Maxine look-alike Harriet Christian. (You can watch Christian at the rally here .)

Every protest needs its ironic placard, and this one was no exception. The Peasants with Pitchforkstm even marched over from Priscilla’s page to give our Ironic Placard Holder some support. Guess none of them have ever heard of double irony …*

Last but not least was the Angry Shouter - “Keep children safe from David Letterman’s mouth! He is a verbal pedophile! He will rape them with his mouth!” - who has quite the mouth herself. But wait! What’s that going on behind her?

Fire Letterman Rally - Rightwing Lunatic
(*Okay, I just found out that Ironic Placard Holder wasn’t really a protester, but I like the photo so Im leaving it in. It turns out that IPH was a plant from Sirius Radio’s Ron and Fez Show.)

Watch the video: