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"The War on Christmas" - Here We Go Again!

Reported by Marie Therese - October 21, 2005

John Gibson was interviewed yesterday by Bill O'Reilly on the topic of his new book, The War on Christmas: How the Liberal Plot to Ban the Sacred Christian Holiday Is Worse Than You Thought. My first and last "poetic" take on this topic follows.

'Twas two months before Christmas
And all through the right
Came soldiers of Jesus
To smote and to smite
The legions of darkness,
The purveyors of sin,
Those loony-bin lefties
Who hate God's only son.

Libs howl and foam at the mouth
They sue and they sue
Abetted and aided
By that nasty old ACLU.
With quill pen a-flutter
One intrepid soul
Did venture to report
On this horror, we're told.

His name is John Gibson
Of Big Story fame
White-haired and pudgy
Schlocko news, his game.

He's written a tome
A nice piece of snark
"The War on Christmas"
Which he hopes will spark
The wrath of the righteous
In church, mall and park.

Gibson's thesis is simple
There's a vast liberal plot
To ban Sacred Christmas
It's worse than you thought!
Those rabid progressives
Eyes all a-glow
Seek to ban creches,
From all venues, you know.

Christmas trees, Santa,
Even the red and the green
Heaven protect us
It's truly obscene!
His good buddy Bill
The O'Reilly was keen
To help his old pal
Hype his message so clean.

Red states, awake!
The wolf's at your door!
Thanks to the fringe
With lawsuits galore
Your kiddies won't know
What the season is for.

The loony left, the gays and the fems,
Seek to shield rights
For the god-less few.
But you know we'll fight
That's what we do.
We're Guardians of the Light.
Who cares about "them"
Muslim, Athieist, Buddhist or Jew?

As for me, I've had it.
I'm up to my ears
No more will I write
Of anti-Christmas jeers.
This is my last post,
News Hounds readers so dear,
About FOX attacks on the day
I love best in the year.

With wars in two countries
People dead, corpses decayed,
Torture rampant, oil out of sight,
Economy fizzling, indicting Delay,
I've better things to do
With my time each day.
So, toodle-loo, Johnny & Billy,
You've got nothing new to say.
Your Christmas jihad is a very old game
That I, for one, just don't want to play.

COMMENT
This will be my very last post on the ridiculous topic of the assault on Christmas. There is no such thing. It doesn't exist except in the minds of a few demagogues like Gibson and O'Reilly who are pandering to a small minority in the vast, varied patchwork that is the electorate of the United States of America.


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